What should I say or get?
Second Positioning
See the other person's reality before you decide what to say.
Second Positioning
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Curiosity changes the quality of every message.
The mindset comes first, then the method follows.
Begin with your current approach
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Before I explain this, pause the video and say out loud how you would handle this today. Do not overthink it, just say the first thing that comes to mind. Then press play and we will take it from there.
Start with one real message, content draft, or important conversation.
Your first answer gives us somewhere real to begin.
The self-focused default
03
Everything revolves around my words, my result, and my performance.
Attention quietly collapses onto the self.
What should I say or get?
How do I sound convincing?
How do I get the result I want?
Self-focused performance makes real listening much harder.
Attachment makes the other person's reality harder to hear.
Marc's origin
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The shift began on the streets.
Marc was shy and selling on the streets.
Repeated rejection kept pulling his attention back to what he should say.
His mentor shifted the question toward what the other person really wanted from him.
The breakthrough was an internal move, not a clever selling trick.
The other person became the centre of attention.
A worldview before a method
05Second Positioning starts with genuine care.
Stay curious about their reality.
Let service guide the next move.
Listen fully before you decide what comes next.
Want the best for them, even when it does not benefit you.
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Pause and explain this idea out loud in your own words, as if a friend just asked you how it works.
Influence follows when people feel seen.
The method only works when the mindset is sincere.
The central contrast
06The quality of the question changes the quality of the message.
What is this person living through, and what would genuinely help them now?
Step out of your own head before you communicate.
The other person's point of view becomes the starting point.
Doctor, not salesperson
07A good doctor diagnoses before prescribing anything.
Start by diagnosing their current reality.
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Listen and let them correct you.
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Prescribe only what genuinely helps them.
The best answer may not benefit you, and that is part of the standard.
Service matters more than securing a yes.
Detachment keeps your judgment focused on service.
The supporting tool
08State → Ideate → Evaluate
State
Reset your intention toward curiosity and service.
→
Ideate
See their hopes, concerns, words, and current reality.
→
Evaluate
Read it from their point of view and rate its helpfulness.
Under 8 out of 10
Return to State and Ideate.
The process turns the mindset into a repeatable action.
The rating is the final gate, not the heart of the idea.
Step 1
09Shift your state before you try to see through someone else's eyes.
State interrupts the usual pattern.
Take a few slow breaths.
Go for a short walk.
Write the situation down clearly.
Reset your intention toward curiosity, service, and the person's best interest.
Your intention shapes what you notice next.
Pause before you draft or respond.
Step 2
10Ideate from evidence, not certainty.
What are they worried about?
What would make their life or work easier?
What are three to five likely concerns?
Their real words belong at the centre.
What are they hoping for?
What would success look like for them?
What are three to five likely motivators?
Use their exact words when possible. If you are unsure, ask or listen instead of assuming. “So what I'm hearing is...” lets them correct your understanding.
You are building a clearer view, not pretending to read a mind.
Real words are stronger than convenient assumptions.
Step 3
11Evaluate it from the recipient's point of view.
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Rate how relevant and helpful it feels. If it is under 8, return to State and Ideate or get a second pair of eyes.
Try it with your real material.
Pause here and try this step with your own current message or conversation question. Then press play and I will walk you through the example from the lesson.
The gate checks the result of the mindset and listening work.
A number cannot replace sincere curiosity.
Marc's example
12Move from an I-question to a recipient question.
“How do I create a successful book launch?”
→
“What would make someone more likely to buy my book?”
The new question starts with the other person's decision.
This is Marc's own book-launch example.
Other applications
13The same mindset sharpens presentations and content.
Ask before shaping the presentation.
Curiosity starts with the audience's reality, then the presentation is shaped around what they say.
Goals
Challenges
Questions
Problems
Read the content as someone seeing it for the first time.
Ask whether it feels clear and useful to someone who does not share your context yet.
They may be unfamiliar with this.
They may already feel overwhelmed.
They are unsure whether it makes sense.
The application changes, but the point of view stays the same.
Content and presentations both begin with the recipient.
Your finished output
14Build one recipient-led rewrite from real material.
1
Name the real person and situation.
2
Keep the original self-focused question or draft.
3
Write the short State reset.
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List three to five motivators and three to five concerns.
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Write the recipient-led question or message.
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Rate it from the recipient's point of view, and return to State and Ideate when the rating is under 8.
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Make the final version acknowledge their reality, help them make sense of the situation, and make the next step simple without pressure.
One real rewrite is enough for this video.
Use exact words and flag every assumption.
Finish and use the rewrite
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Definition of done
You have one real situation, one recipient-led rewrite, a recipient-view rating of at least 8 out of 10, and one clear use within 24 hours.
Before you move on, say out loud the one thing that surprised you in this video, and the first place you will use it.
Finish this sentence in your own words: if I open the real message, content draft, or conversation plan I chose in this video, then I will run State → Ideate → Evaluate and finish my recipient-led rewrite, by this time tomorrow.
One month from now, how will you know this video worked? Say it in one sentence before you move on.
Picture four weeks from now, when seeing the other person's reality before deciding what to say is simply how you work. Today is where that starts.
Before you close this video, drop one line in the community: what will you use tomorrow? Not what you liked, what you will actually use.
Finish one rewrite and use it within 24 hours.
The mindset becomes real when it changes what you send or say.